By: Yadi Martínez-Reyna
Sitting in a room with curtains drawn, darkness surrounds me all around.
It shows the mood I have been in recently where the sun is not shining and when it is, I refuse to let it warm me.
Ruega por mi
Those who said yes to the call at times face this time when the curtains are drawn for no one can suspect or know we are down.
¡Mi testimonio, Dios mio que diran!
Sitting in darkness, I wonder out loud about this calling. Yes, I have chosen many times it is best to be alone.
We work for the people those around us know.
Oh Holy-One we work for the people; help me show them hope.
Surely, to show emotional distress will give our enemy’s glee, and our people unrest.
So, who sits with the Pastor in a wobbly state? Dios Mio, what will one say?
Will they say one is weak, unhealthy, unwise, or simply too human to hold a disguise?
Have Mercy on me!
I wonder, who sits with the receiver of this call when one is in distress?
If you're like me God forbid a soul shall see such a human plight, for I feel like I’m free falling from very high.
¡Mi testimonio, Dios mio que diran!
Yet, we know that to be healthy, and wise, one must have their own safety harbor, within the boundaries of their own casa.
But who is at home to hear the challenges, and our cries?
Who lifts us up when everyone has just walked by?
¡Señor, ten Piedad!
We can’t forever over burden our familia, so we pretend we are okay, and healing has happened. After all, we signed up for the gig and accepted the call, they just happen to be part of the journey we are on.
A ti sea la gloria!
Oh the call!
We shall smile!
We shall pray, and we hold people up.
Even when at times it means dragging ourselves to the ground.
Oh, the martyrs that no one has really called upon! Who appointed me or you a Saint for all? So, when distress comes, we must remember it is time to head to a harbor nearby.
¡Señor, ten Piedad!
A harbor where in the darkness like Hebrew prophets in sac clothed one can lay before God crying for Mercy, and the fuerza to go on.
A prayer with tears where one must ask to help quench our fears and feel grace like a weighted blanket covering us in love holding us still.
Ruega por vosotros!
That blanket of protection that reminds us of those who keep up with our light in sight.
The ones who will reach in and put their hands on our backs when we are down, to tell us that all shall be well, and that is all.
¡A Dios sea la Gloria!
Those that we can trust who are strong in their faith.
Those other souls who pastor in the field who can relate to a casual frail state.
For those in the field know that even when we are careful to perfection, we might get sunburned and get a badly irritation.
¡Ten misericordia de mi,o Dios!
Praise be those in the field.... chasing the calling!
Paise be for the credentials of my own calling!
Yes, for people like me know it helps to have papeles!
¡A Dios sea la Gloria!
Praise be this calling, even in a wobbly state, I consider myself lucky!
What an honor to share in the work of the people we serve, those in the margins, the outcast, reflecting our own. Lucky to stand in the line with my progressive siblings Pastors who are hit through the right, and the left.
Let us hold each other upright but never uptight, Praise Be to God!
Prayer:
Holy one, today I pray for those who said yes to the call, who journey for the people with their worn out chaclas and all. May we find peace, a friend who can truly like that Biblical Job’s friends just sit. I repeat a friend who can JUST SIT. A friend silently there not to tell us how to fix it, or what we should feel but hold to us accountable to never give into fear. Gracias for those who hold us in sight, who know our human state even as prophets of your call. So I plea for those who are serving the people today, know that there is someone praying for them. For I believe you have great plans for us all! Oh Holy-One-of-the-Called, may we not forget to hold on to each other in love.
Amen